Date #19 - Water and Wine (and Whitey)

Our 19th date was on Father's Day. But since neither of our sons were in the state to celebrate with their Dad, we decided to leave the state as well....and drove to Newport, R.I.

Newport is a beautiful city and always a favorite destination of ours. We try to get down there not often enough at least once every summer. Through the years we've biked the historic 10-mile drive, visited all the mansions, walked the length of the cliff walk, gambled at the Jai Ali fronton, and even watched our son compete in track meets at St. George's.

For our date, we decided to do something completely different that we'd never done before...we took a cruise of the beautiful harbor and Narraganset Bay on the Majestic, operated by the Newport Cruise Company.

Thanks to Groupon, we only paid half price for the one-hour voyage, but we would have gladly shelled out full price for the trip. It was terrific. The tour took us through the harbor and around Goat Island into the Bay. Our narrator/guide was an older woman who was quite versed in everything you'd ever want to know about Newport and, best of all, she had the strongest Rhode Island accent...the letter R never passed her lips. LOL

We sailed past Fort Adams and some of the grandest mansions in Newport - Hammersmith Farm, Castle Hill, and Ocean Cliff - and they were even more impressive and beautiful when viewed from the sea. The most amazing mansion was Clingstone, which was literally built on a rock in Narraganset Bay. It's accessible only by boat, and can be rented for the bargain rate of $7500 per week. Here's a picture I stole borrowed from http://www.rhodeislandbaycruises.com/

And if exotic and remote vacation destinations are your thing....we discovered another within spitting distance. The Rose Island Lighthouse is a working lighthouse and museum that you can visit by ferry. However, you can also spend a night in the museum or (I love this) you can actually be a full time keeper for the week. But before you get any romantic notions, keep in mind that it's a working vacation where your duties include raising/lowering the flag, managing the electrical and water system, cleaning the lighthouse, greeting the museum visitors, hosting the overnight guests, and collecting fees. And, get this, not only do you volunteer your services, you get to pay $1000-2300/week for the pleasure. Click here if you have lost your mind and would actually consider this a fun thing to do!

Our cruise ended right where it began, at Bowen's Wharf.

From there we strolled next door to The Landing Restaurant, where we snagged a table on the upper deck and enjoyed the great weather and some fabulous food and adult beverages while enjoying the view of all the yachts in the marina. It was mind-boggling to consider the $$$ that were floating before our eyes. Just how many gazillionaires are there in this tiny neck of the woods?

After our leisurely lunch, we meandered through the shops and boutiques that are ubiquitous in every coastal town. And I'm a sucker for every one of them....although on this particular day we were simply looky-loo's because we didn't buy anything. I lie...we did splurge on some yummy gelato. Then we made our way back to the car and drove to the last stop on our date.

Once again we had half-price vouchers (from Eversave.com) for a tour of the vineyards and wine-tasting at Newport Vineyards. But unlike the harbor cruise, we both agreed that this experience wasn't even worth the discounted price of admission. Maybe we were spoiled from the only other vineyard tour we'd ever taken...the Robert Mondavi Winery in Napa...but this didn't even come close.

Our wine tasting took place in the gift shop, where we were handed a menu of all the wines available and told to select five. Then they proceeded to pour one mouthful two-fingers of each wine we'd selected. That was it. There was no explanation of the differences, no lesson in tasting wine, no recommendations, nothing. Just a basket of crackers and a carafe of water to rinse your glass between tastings. There was one person pouring for about six couples, and the only interaction was when she'd ask, "Are you ready for your next one?"

I don't believe we had the equivalent of a full glass of wine by the time we finished. And the worst part, their sparkling wine was not included in the wine tasting. But they were more than willing to sell me a bottle of Brut for $34.95. Really?! When all was said and done, there wasn't one wine we tasted that was worth purchasing (and TH drinks wine almost exclusively, but he didn't care of any of them).

After the wine tasting, it was time for the tour. And if we thought the wine tasting was a waste of time, the tour was worse not much better. A young college-age girl conducted the tour, and I couldn't stop focusing on the fact that every third word out of her mouth was either "like" or "um". And it didn't help that we had some obnoxious hillbilly in our group that kept asking her stupid questions like "what's the difference between champagne and sparkling wine?" At least she answered that one correctly.

We toured the unimpressive vineyards out back (their main/larger vineyards are not at this location), and the barrel rooms. And after about 15 minutes, the tour was over...that quick. Then our tourguide led us into an outdoor tent where there were counters with the same baskets of crackers and carafes of water. She passed out the menus and told us to select five wines, while she went to get glasses. We stared incredulously at some of the other couples who had already tasted wine with us earlier...but it didn't appear that anyone was going to tell her. TH and I just looked at each other and headed for the nearest exit.

But we did get to take home our wine glasses as souvenirs!

So three days after this date, Whitey Bulger was captured... which brought its share of excitement to our family with both our sons having front row seats. But when I heard how Whitey and Catherine spent their 16 years on the lam, all I could think was Holy Crap! While I was happy to hear she was still alive (contrary to popular local opinions), I was flabbergasted to even imagine what those years must have been like. While I love TH, I could not contemplate spending 16 days completely alone with him, let alone years. I would surely have killed him by now. 

With no girlfriends for her to hang out with, to shop with, to get drunk and vent with; no buddies for him to watch a game with or have a beer with; no children or grandchildren to enjoy and play with; no family to share holidays and special occasions; no co-workers to interact with; WHAT THE HELL DID THEY DO TOGETHER FOR 16 YEARS?! She doesn't deserve jail time, she's already served 16 years in almost solitary confinement!